5 Febreros

By Anais Lopez

I have these moments of retrospect at least 3 times a day. Melancholy in its own way. It’s beautiful though…
Only 5 years ago did I have my quinceañera. Ironically, I meet you only 2 days before my birthday. Only one day before Valentines day.
Do you remember our primer febrero?
Sitting down reading a children’s dinosaur book at Borders because all the tickets to Valentine’s Day were sold out.
      Nuestro primer Febrero.
Our second and third febreros… filled with great conversations, good music and adventure. But don’t forget the hurtful words, the unsureness, the relationships we had with others and the drunk messages. The jealously.
 These two febreros are where we learned not only about each other but ourselves. Everything arounds us slowly being destroyed and rebuilt.
    “Somos de la misma tierra. Somos mexican@s. Si nuestros padres pudieron, nosotros podemos.”
Do you remember our fourth febrero?
This is the one febrero that won’t leave my mind. The one that I remember fully. Every curve you felt, every conversation we had. It was our first time for many things.
Your lips felt so full against mine. Our bodies moved to the rhythm of our hearts. Our eyes met at every moment they could.
Drawing each other that night was the highlight of that year.
   Do you remember that febrero as well as I do?
And then, like all good things, it came to an end.
It was followed by last year’s febrero, when I tried to forget you.
  It is being followed now by this febrero…

 

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